Wednesday, 27 July 2016


The following is the unedited version of an exposé currently featured in the 17th revised edition of The Moonshine Memorandum(see below). If you wish to report libel or inaccuracies, please email . To make a formal complaint under IPSO rules please contact IPSO directly at .

   It has been said that the difference between a writer and a journalist is that
Le Monde makes an impassioned plea...
journalists don’t get writer’s block. Which may also explain why the journalist’s mandate does not, as a rule, involve plagiarisms or doctored facts. It does, on the other hand, have the potential to distort the true scale of events. Indeed, it can be convincingly argued that, for sheer clout, the press is up there with potentates and demagogues - incendiary in a crisis and absent when confronted with responsibilities. The two Gulf wars, after all, were the bastard offsprings of multinational media manipulation. And please don't tell me that the succession of incidents beginning with, say, Fort Hood US Army base in Killeen, Texas, 2009, Fusilier Lee Rigby, Charlie Hebdo, San Bernardino, Orlando, Paris, Brussels, Nice, Munich, Normandy, and again New York and New Jersey etc. would equally have taken place without the media and its gagging reproductive newsreel cycle. Examples could go on, but the point is plain: It would be hard to frame a pretext better calculated to inflame the copy-cat - while not giving a rat's ass, in a poignant phrase, that they are playing at ground zero of the global calamity.
All of which leads me to that ‘slick bastard’ (the epithets are various) known as Jon Snow, and “the almost hysterical Channel 4 News”.[1] A relic of the ever-adolescent Marxist 68ers - and avenger of the oppressed  – one has reasonable grounds for believing that Jon Snow is, or may be, an individual who facilitates the commission of one of the world's fastest growing illegal activities: Terrorism. The significant consideration being that Snow, like any other crusading news anchor, is able brazenly and barefacedly to boost and bump up the dangers inherent in a potentially inflationary copy-cat situation. Creating the very thing we're seeking to avoid. And never mind the crocodile tears trickling down his compassionate Caucasian face. Snow came to Channel 4 with righteousness on his side and an excess of moral rectitude, unlike his incessantly irritating and gobby crony, “Jon’s Mini-Me,”[2] Krishnan Guru-Murthy, the clown prince of news-desk interrogation,  just 5ft 10in, but as thickly forequartered as a pit bull, who makes it quiet plain that he couldn’t care less. The less gifted a bastard, the meaner the method! No master of English prose,  Krishnan is the backup bully, and his modus  not so
much an inquiry as an obituary: “Listen pal,” he said to me, chomping a packet of crisps, “if you stop talking while I’m talking, you’ll be ok.”[3]
     If Jon Snow has no understanding of unbiased reporting, Krishnan has an existential predicament. He doesn’t know whether to become another apoplectic, overfed, invidious, ‘syphilitic parasite’[4] of the social movement termed PC, or stick to the venerable but vulnerable ethnicity that got him his job in the first place. So they have to keep sustaining each other with lines from their common credo: “Never give Israel an even break!” With its evident culpability of the crime of existing,  Jon Snow reasons, journalistic objectivity and ethical constraint can safely be ignored. Dreyfus is guilty. The case is closed!
Where Guru-Murthy' mode of prompting has become the stuff of legend – ‘Yes!’ or ‘No!’, Snow  is  an aggressive prosecutor with a flair for visceral cross-examination (complete with a specific hissing cadence), who retains all of his  ‘undergraduate attitude’ – “a crude left-wing view, that privileged people and the aspirational middle class cannot be good: their moral credentials are necessarily undermined by their social position,” as Minette Marrin competently expressed it. Frankly, I don’t recall ever having  come across a more aggressive and depressing approach to newscasting than an anchor who  actively
presents himself as the unerotic version of Che Guevara. Besides,  I’m troubled by people who foam at the mouth. For in both these cases, it is to their abiding detriment. Both men are so terribly righteous, so terrified of losing status if their back is turned, so obsessed with correctness, diversity, minority, so jumpy at discussing racial or religious differences, they don’t get anything discussed at all. What you have instead is Krishnan’s surrender of  subtlety to the more effective method of strangulation: “confirm or deny”! Which could plainly do for impartial inquiry what Rottweiler John Humphrys has done for even-handed journalism – kill it dead.

[1] ©Dominic Lawson
[2] © Rod Liddle
[3] 22/04/2015 Robert Downey Jr walks out on Krishnan Guru-Murthy.
[4] ©Robert Downey Jr.

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