Wednesday, 23 March 2016

BREXIT - Survival is Victory !

The following is the unedited version of an exposé currently featured in the 34th revised edition of Malleus Maleficus, The Moonshine Memorandum. If you wish to report slander or inaccuracies, please email  To make a formal complaint under IPSO rules please contact IPSO directly at .  
The bookies' favourite to be the next Prime Minister !
          Acutely preoccupied with his own image, his tousled hairstyle, his loopy demeanour and ill-fitting suits, the urge to compete for attention, much effort  might be expended trying to figure out what type of buffoon Boris Johnson aspires to, whether it is a "mutton-headed mugwump", or Baron Cohen’s Borat. My guess is both. Whatever the demons driving him on, he invariably places his foot in his mouth on every possible occasion, imprecise and irreproachably dotty, until he finds another crag to cling on to. Some people never come of age. Relieved of an assignment that had brought him only ridicule and contempt, gone are those massive ambassadorial clangers that were Her Britannic Majesty's Foreign Secretary’s signature tune. Not to mention his reversion to backwood Little Englander. A much more devastating combination than actual incompetence, transforming Britain from the arbiter of nations into the backwater sticks that spawned the likes of  Michael Gove,  Liam Fox  and Dave Davis - all of whom exaggerated the benefits of terminating EU
membership by a factor at least of three. That was a politically delinquent misrepresentation of actual prospects. For the likes of Johnson it was also a measure of his own strategic brilliance, rather than defective character. His success, his popularity, his prominence are founded on a lie. Like the fool in King Lear, he’s allowed to get away with things no other 'courtier' would. All bonhomie, wisecracks and Churchillian wit, his main problem is that neither he nor the rest of the Brexiteers has any realistic economic strategy to get Britain out of Europe. Indeed, it is important to see his war of words for what it is. It’s all about saving his own skin. And that's how bad things have become. For who are the real winners in this dismal diplomatic meltdown? Liars, law-twisters, casuists, and political sophists with the conscience of prostitutes and pimps. 

           There is no possibility of a mistake: Providence has marked out this moment for the final humiliation of Albion. A declining Great Britain, governed by the dregs of the nation. Which is an historical cul-de-sac. For make no mistake, in the mind and psyche of much of the rest of the world, this is payback time. Or as a senior EU official was overheard as saying: "The position of most member states and the commission is simple.
A powerful example of market-forces operating inefficiently!
The UK economy must not be seen to thrive after Brexit." 
Which may sound like antagonism, but, believe me, it is such a self-evident truth as to be almost benign. A minister from Merkel's Cabinet stated very clearly: There must be a visible difference between being in the EU and being out of it. Other experts, such as The Sunday Times columnist Rod Liddle, even had the acuity to observe that “It is no longer our upper lips that are renowned among foreigners for being perennially stiff!” As indeed,  Britain will soon be reduced to being a leading exporter of stag and hen parties to Mediterranean sea-side resorts, where sex-crazed young Brits can freely fellate with sweaty open-mouthed girls squatting in gutters. For they sure frighten me. And not only me. As the historian Macaulay observed: "England armed, and Spain receded"  Once the defender of the liberties of Europe, this then is Great Britain’s apotheosis. Albion disappearing up her own arse - the place where all our noblest dreams come to die.
At pains not to rule out
future claims to Antarctica
if only Scots vote for
“England” said Pitt, “has saved herself by her exertions, and will, as I trust, save Europe by her example.” In fact, it is impossible, to the best of my belief, to do justice to this island nation without reaching the conclusion that she has brought into existence laws and rules of behaviour we now recognize as universal; liberties not so much of Englishmen as of all men; rights that are constituent elements of any other race, nation, or people, to whom the term 'civilized' can with justice be applied. For what would the world be like if the British had stayed at home? As indeed, Zeno, in 300 BC Athens, already preached the doctrine of a World State, while the Romans introduced a common currency that extended from beyond the Tigris to Hadrian‘s Wall, but - as the last word in self-love  - today even a £ 10 note issued by the Bank of Scotland arouses fierce xenophobic suspicion. As Scotland, indeed, is one of the worthiest examples in history of a people whose elected
Survival is Victory !
representation is so grossly deviant as not merely to distort its own, but altogether pervert the United Kingdom's entire geo-political history.
  Very evidently, understanding Brexit philosophy is no easy matter. But let's be clear about this. Brexit isn't a political philosophy or a national movement - it is an existential neurosis and a harbinger of fall and decline. Once the arbiters of nations, the champions of the liberties of the world, now degenerated into the dejected spirit of a people no longer imbued with the ideas of conquest and greatness, what you are witnessing is the demise of a great nation, the death of something which once sailed to the ends of the earth. The annihilation of a whole culture, a whole system of thought based on Hellenistic values and Judaeo-Christian ethics...

I had a dream, which was not all a dream.
The bright sun was extinguished, and the stars
Did wander darkling in the eternal space,
Rayless and pathless...

Byron, Darkness

 Malleus Maleficus is an advocate of English liberal democracy, and the  anonymous author of an historiographic apology of the British Empire. 


Marie Louise said...

Re.: Romans, most appropriately, Claudius, too, has been seen as a bumbling idiot, rather like Boris Johnson

Patrizia Pellegrino said...

It's haunting; can't help being intrigued by it. Britain isolated, economically selfish, stripped of almost every historical connection, a lugubrious shadow, democratically retrograde, left-liberally governed, with only the memory of her historical yesteryear or - what? Or what happened to the idea of individual sacrifice to the greater communal good, so selflessly advocated under the hallowed imperial Commonwealth?? Primus inter pares - do me a favor...

Phil said...

Truth to tell, they’re murdering one of mankind’s greatest dreams. The dream of Human Brotherhood.

Calvin P. said...

I've heard of half-wits, but Boris and his "part-Kenyan Obama" ramble seems nothing short of a bunch of English yobs singing, "You’re going home in a f***** ambulance." With all respect, the motive was purely practical. Commenting on issues affecting the international community, global economy and political unity, to say nothing of UK-US (special) relations, well, that's part of the US President's job. That's what he's elected to do. Paid for. Rather than be playing golf. Just listen to him, Asshole!